Please pass the Rogaine

I've been making fun of my baby for only losing hair on one side of his head. If they made Chia pets that look like babies and you only watered half of it, that's what he looks like. I thought it was being rubbed off in his sleep, but he's pretty still when he sleeps, and he doesn't sleep on the bald side.

Then it hit me. It's my fault!

When he cries, I soothe him by putting my cheek against the side of his head and 'shhhing' in his ear. His head is still pretty wobbly so it's rubbing against my cheek. And I only hold him like that on one side - the balding side.

So could someone please pass the Rogaine? I figure a little and he'll be good as new. Maybe that and some T-Gel for his cradle-cap-from-hell.

While you're at it, could you hook me up too? I seem to be losing more than he is as I'm getting over the whole pregnancy thing. Maybe I shouldn't feel bad for turning him into some freaky half-grown chia pet and just call it even.