Last week I went to dinner with a bunch of other moms that have kids the same age as DD. We met through a hospital group just after our kids were born, We were all first time moms, we were tired, overwhelmed, confused - we bonded. As we figured things (motherhood) out, we stopped going to group, but started once a week playgroups. And a summer picnic, a Christmas party, a birthday party for the kids, a book club, and dinners out with just the moms now and then.
As I've gotten to know these women over the past couple of years, I've realized how dissimilar our lives are. Some work, some don't. Some have had trouble with their marriages or finances. Most seem to be pretty well off, educated, and have a sense of style. One thing that's been interesting is getting a glimpse into a more prosperous life-style.
It turns out all of the moms still have baby gates up (except me). None of the kids sleep in their parents' rooms (except mine). They don't let their children go anywhere in the house unescorted. They certainly wouldn't let them play alone in a room. I listen to how busy their weekends are with swim lessons, gym classes, sign classes. One of them is having a Latin woman come into their home just to speak spanish to the toddler.
Anyway, so here's the thing. There isn't anything wrong with what they're doing. They are happy, they've got a purpose. They're friendly and nice to me. Their kids still go through the same phases as mine does. I like them.
I guess it's like taking a peek at a life that I'll never have. I want DD to have opportunities, but somehow I think that in the end, she will know just as much if not more about the real world if I let her fall off the bed a couple of times and eat non-organic food. I still don't know if I'll put her in public school, but she knows how to walk up and down the stairs now on her own, and instead of babyproofing the whole house I've taught her to what not to touch and now we're working on obedience.
Notwithstanding, I still come away from my encounters with these moms with a feeling that I should be doing more.
November
6 days ago
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